Will you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?

"That depends a good deal on where you want to get to," said the cat.

"I don't much care where - " said Alice.

"Then it doesn't matter which way you go," said the cat.

Through the course of my life I have found myself quite driven in a vast array of different career objectives.  From saving the American Indians to becoming a missionary pilot to a host of entrepreneurial ideas ranging the gamut of industry.  In the first ten years of adulthood I have lived in five different states.  And, though it is almost painful to create this list and admit this truth, in this same timeframe I have held 16 different paid positions in nine different fields.

Each position has taught me about myself, about others, and about the world.  Each position, regardless of status, has taught me about leadership, about management, and about business in general.  I have loved and I have hated parts of every job that I have held.  And as I reflect on the positions individually, it is my sincere belief that I was an asset to each company that I worked for, regardless of my length of stay (with the possible exception of one which will be explored in a future posting).  

While I have enjoyed immensely the opportunity that I have had to see the world and gather this assortment of experiences, and while I have every confidence that one day all of said experiences will come miraculously together to exhibit just the perfect mix of skill set for exactly what I'm meant to do, it seems at this stage that a few of these decisions have created a roadblock for me to move forward in any direction.

Not only have I discovered a roadblock in being hired, I have realized an internal dilemma of enormous proportions.  I have finally come to the point where I want to really hunker down and pursue something.  I am tired of entry-level positions and being led by leaders and managers who are poor at what they do.  I believe that I am an exceptional person.  I have finally come to recognize that I have certain gifts that set me apart and remarkable potential that could lead to great things.  Unfortunately, I am at a complete loss as to what those great things might possibly be.  

As I type this I have compiled a list of eight career areas, some more specific than others, where I believe I would find enjoyment and success.  Hence the great dilemma.  I find myself almost paralyzed with how many ideas I have.  It seems that each day I find myself attached to a new idea, brainstorming the steps it's going to take me to get there, and then realizing that perhaps I am meant to be doing something else entirely.  And the cycle repeats itself almost daily. In fact, in the course of writing this paragraph, I have added three more ideas to the list.

As of today, I have been officially unemployed for one week.  Finding myself here was not a surprise as I had agreed to a position that corresponded to a budget year that ended April 30th and I made the decision not to continue in the position for the following budget year.  (Sidenote:  let's consider that a great victory as I have been able to successfully rule out a potential field!)  However, as each day passes that I do not hear back from position listings that I have pursued over the past two months, my sense of urgency increases exponentially.  

I need to figure out what field to pursue so that I can pursue it wholeheartedly and not be overwhelmed by the vast number of job postings and opportunities that I find.  I need to be able to focus my efforts so as not to experience undue disappointment and discouragement from fields that don't matter anyway.  And, quite frankly, I just need to get on with my life.

So here I sit.  Seeking the insight of those who know me well, of those who have worked with me, of those who care about me, and even of those who might simply find me a curiosity.  If you are willing, please join me as I explore the jobs I've held, as I delve into the ideas I have, and as I take a serious look at where on earth God might possibly be leading me for the long run.

"--so long as I get SOMEWHERE," Alice added as an explanation.